Changing Christmas Plans Due To Chronic Illness (Blogmas2019:4)

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My entire life, my mum has always thrown a big Christmas dinner. My grandparents would come round and we would eat her delicious food that she had been preparing for days and watch Christmas TV in our pyjamas. However, both my mum and I have multiple chronic illnesses and so this got more difficult to manage every year. A few years ago we had to make some changes that we had never planned to do, but it has turned out so much easier. We decided to start going out for Christmas dinner, at first to a local restaurant and this year we are booked into a carvery. We had always thought of Christmas as a stay-at-home, family day and thought that going out for it would take away something that made Christmas day what it was. If anything, however, it has made our Christmas day so much better!

Instead of spending all of our time and energy making a massive meal that involves days of prep, pulling out and setting a table big enough for everyone, and then clearing it all up afterwards, we can use our very limited energy to spend time together doing fun Christmas activities. I treasure all of my Christmas memories growing up, and wouldn’t change them for the world, but looking back every year when I was opening my presents my mum would be popping her head into the living room whilst spending most of her time cooking in the kitchen – that can’t have been great for her. Getting to sit together and open presents, go out for food, come home and snuggle into our pyjamas, spend time exploring our gifts, and watch some great Christmas TV whilst stuffing our faces with Christmas goodies.

Most years, I had an incredible Christmas day, but it always ended with me lying on the couch or in bed exhausted and in pain and feeling as if I didn’t actually get time to check out my gifts and spend quality family time together. Now, I can still enjoy a big family meal and I get to do all of the other Christmassy things that I want to. Changing how we celebrated Christmas, whether it was to accommodate our illnesses or not, didn’t take something away from the occasion but instead added the opportunity to have a full and happy day without worrying about disappointing people because of the limits imposed upon us by our health. I shouldn’t feel pressured into having a ‘conventional’ or ‘traditional’ Christmas if it does not actually suit my needs and wants, and I am really looking forward to our Christmas celebrations this year.

Scottish author and book reviewer

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